Monday, September 1, 2008

Interpersonal Conflict

There is a lady working as a secretary. At 430 pm on a weekday, she found that there was little work left, so he made a call to her boyfriend after which they dicided to meet after work at 500 pm downstairs of her company. They planned to have dinner together, followed by watching a movie.

Unexpectedly, at 10 minutes to the end of the whole day’s work, her boss suddenly came to her, holding a pile of documents, anxiously asked whether she would like to work overtime. Because a client shift the meeting time to the following morning, so the manager needed some of the materials to be ready by 900 am on the next day. After a glance at the stack of file, this lady knew for sure that the work would take at least 3 to 4 hours to be finished. So what shall she do? How should she react?

Two responds were quickly formed in her mind. One was to sacrifice her own benefit, stay and complete the job given. For God’s sake, that was her boss. How could someone refuse the request given by she/he boss? If so, she has to go downstairs and tell her boyfriend that the activities for the night are cancelled due to blabla, then come back and work on. The boss would be happy, but it would certainly be very disappointed to herself and her boyfriend.
The other alternative was simply to say no and sorry to her boss and tell him she already had some arrangement for that night. Maybe the boss could find someone else. However, this will surely leave a bad impression to the boss.
Neither way seemed to be pleasant for her. So in the end she just lied to her boss that she was not feeling well and was going to see a doctor at night. Although her boyfriend was always supportive to her job, breaking the promise to him would make her feel even more regretful. She was also afraid that it might cause problems between them some day if things like this continued.
This is a real story happened to a friend of mine who is quite cautious and compliant to her superiors. But I cannot totally agree to her choice in this case. Forget about whether the boss would believe what she said, being dishonest itself is something very wrong. Here we should recognize that the most important issue is the task given by the boss. Negotiation can still be made on the premise of completing the job. For example, she consented to work for overtime. But even so people still need to eat right? She could go down and eat with her boyfriend, then tell him about the sudden task given and postpone the movie to another day.
How do you guys think about her choice made? Are there any other better alternatives?

4 comments:

joyce said...

Dear Dongge,

I agree that it was certainly wrong of the secretary to lie. She could have sincerely told her boss that she had plans for the night or she could have explained the situation to her boyfriend. I am sure he will understand since he has 'always been supportive of her work'. I felt that her decision to lie was based on the fear that problems will arise between her and her boyfriend. However, it seems to me that there was no cause for worry unless she does not believe her boyfriend is supportive of her work.

She could have also explained that she had something on for the night and asked the boss if he could assign the task to another person. If no replacement was found, then she could stay on and do the job.

Yu Ming said...

Yup, I have to agree that Joyce got it down very well. Deceiving her superior most certainly places her into a difficult corner. There is simply too many opportunities and ways for the lie to backfire and create a cataclysmic effect.

Since the topic is to use EQ skills to decide on the best outcome, she should have inquire more into the situation before making a decision. Just as Joyce said, she should have tested the waters by asking if there is somebody else who could the job better. By setting out the 'feelers', the urgency of the matter as well as the implication of deserting the task would become more apparent. Likewise, under the notion that her boyfriend is very supportive, it would help if she shares her predicament with him and collaborate together to find the best solution. That way, even if they finally agree that she should stay back to work, he (the boyfriend) would not feel deserted and abandoned.

Xiuwen said...

Dear Dongge,

I absolutely agree with joyce's and yuming's point of view. The secretary should not have lie regardless of all kinds of tricky situations. Once the lying starts, the occurrence will become more frequent, until a day when the lie is found out by the boss himself. This is of course an undesirable situation to get oneself into!

I believe your friend could have meet with such similar cases after that initial time. Normally, the boss will be very busy and hence, he expects the secretary to help him out with any tasks or chores. Furthermore, it is important for one to build interpersonal skills with the boss. This is so that a certain level of mutual trust could be establish in order for the company to work effectively and efficiently!

Hence, it is really important for your friend to tell the boss frankly and see how much allowance he can give. If not, she could have help the boss out first and tell him that in future he might have to send the documents earlier so that it can be done faster. =)

Brad Blackstone said...

Thanks, Dongge!

Your first two paragraphs pose the issue well, clear and concisely (except for some language issues).

But I feel that you "let the rabbit out of the bag," or give away the solution too easily in the following paragraphs. It might have been better initially just to give more attention to the context of the scenario, providing more detail on your friend's relationship with her boss, the nature of the importance of the job task and other relevant point.

In any case, you have inspired good feedback from your blogging group members.